egg decorating

Ellen made me my very own Lyme disease egg. Isn't it cute!? She copied my lime tattoo and then added a tick to the side. Nothing says Easter like an infectious blood-sucking ectoparasite!

reflections on an annoying holiday

The only Easter decorations I have ever owned, purchased last week.

As a kid, Easter was never one of my favorite holidays - the non-religious aspects of it. Why was a rabbit hiding multicolored chicken eggs from me? Why is he leaving baskets of candy filled with that horrid, stringy, stick-to-everything gaudy plastic grass? I DON'T UNDERSTAND. Not that the concept of some old guy from the North Pole sliding down the chimney and leaving presents made any more sense, but somehow Santa seemed more reasonable.

But the biggest reason I didn't like Easter much was the fact that you were forced to look for things. I have always HATED searching for things, mainly because I've been a scatterbrain since birth and lose things all the time. Every day is Easter for me, people. Where are my keys? Where is my phone? Where is my W-2 form? Where is my thermos - did I leave it in the car again? Why can't I find matching socks? Where's the tape measure? Where's the remote? Where's the charger for my iPod?

It drives me crazy - the hunting, the pushing things aside, the backtracking. Why is there a holiday that celebrates this? It would be like me laying out all my clothes for work, getting my coffee ready, packing a lunch, arranging my purse, and waking up the next morning to find that some giant, hairy animal had broken into my house and hidden it all. And that I was supposed to ENJOY searching for everything before I left for work. Does this sound like fun to you? I didn't think so.

Every year I'd dread helping my brothers find all the eggs, placing them in a big basket, and having my Dad count them. It was torture. And then the dreaded words "there's still two missing!" My brothers would hug themselves with delight and dash off again in pursuit of those two cleverly hidden eggs, and I would inwardly moan and twist with despair. My brain would scramble, I'd get frustrated and cranky, and I'd just wish for it all to be over.

The grand prize, of course, was the Easter basket. This was hidden somewhere you had to work extra hard to find it, like in a closet, under a bed, or in a cupboard. Always trying to be the perfect child and not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings, I pretended to be really excited, but let me tell you: when I found that basket, no one was happier. It wasn't the chocolate eggs or the Pez candy dispenser with a bunny head, or the bag of sickeningly sweet jellybeans. It was the joyous relief that the game was done, and I could stop looking for things.

Even now when I watch my nieces hunt excitedly for their Easter eggs, I wonder what gene I am missing. Sometimes I can't even watch their searching; it drives me bonkers when they can't find them right away. I try to distract myself by taking photos, but then I'm all "crap, what did I do with my lens cap? My memory card is full - where did I put the other one? My feet are cold. Why am I outside without shoes? Where are my shoes? Is this over yet? Is it time to eat ham?"

200th post!

Sometimes I like to photograph my beer in the driveway before drinking it.

This is my 200th post on Blogger! What better way to celebrate than a St. Patrick's Day glass of Guinness?

heap big snow

We had a glorious snow storm here Thursday night. Most of lower Michigan got 9-12". I woke up to the above view of my street (and my neighbor's lonely lit tree) around 7 a.m., snow coming down an inch or more per hour.

Today I cleaned my house, shoveled my driveway, and finished more handmade Christmas gifts; photos to follow tomorrow. My tree is still not up, though it is in a box on my living room floor - so that's progress. Maybe I should just decorate the box with lights and leave it at that.

I've been wandering in and out of the holiday spirit, annoyed at being single yet another year, and missing my grandparents more than ever. But then I think of my nieces and my family and friends, my job, my pets, and my health, and I can't help but be grateful for what I have. I think as you get older, Christmas becomes more about taking stock of your life and remembering what's really important. Like this little cutie who arrived last spring:

love bites

A bouquet of roses I bought for my favorite person. Me.

Valentine's Day is a holiday whose only purpose is to make single people feel like crap. So there.

Not that I'm bitter or anything.

Children's Thoughts on Love

"I think you're supposed to get shot with an arrow or something,
but the rest of it isn't supposed to be so painful."
... Manuel, age 8

"Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too."
...Greg, age 8

"No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with
how you smell...that's why perfume and deodorant is so popular."
...Mae, age 9

"One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she likes to eat.
French fries usually works for me."
... Bart, age 9

"Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention,
but attention ain't the same thing as love."
... Alonzo, age 9 "

When a person gets kissed for the first time, they fall down
and they don't get up for at least an hour."
... Wendy, age 8

"If you want to be loved by somebody who isn't
already in your family, it doesn't hurt to be beautiful."
...Anita, age 8

"I look at kissing like this: Kissing is fine if you like it,
but it's a free country and nobody should be forced to do it."
...Michael, age 8

"Don't say you love somebody and then change your mind ...
Love isn't like picking what movie you want to watch."
... Natalie, age 9

"I'm not rushing into being in love.
I'm finding fourth grade hard enough."
...Regina, age 10

"Love bites. And then it bites more."
...Lisa, age 38

at least the snow is fresh

View of my street this morning.

Well. 2008.

New Year's Eve didn't start out that well. I got some upsetting news about my family in the afternoon. I can't say a lot at this point for legal reasons, but my brother and his ex wife have been having custody issues with their girls. Things escalated over the weekend, and she ended up taking the girls back to her house 45 minutes away from his, yanking them out of their school mid-year so they can attend near her, and limiting his visitation to every other weekend. Unfortunately, she has the legal right to do all of this, but we thought she wouldn't be so disruptive to the girls' routine.

Obviously, we are all very, very upset. The girls had been basically living at my brother's house all week and seeing their mom on the weekends, so this is a huge lifestyle change for them. New house, new school, new friends, their toys and clothes left at their dad's house. My heart breaks for them - their living situation at their mom's is not healthy for them. All part of that really long story.

After hearing about all that had gone down, I just sat on the couch and cried and cried and cried. I haven't cried that hard for a loooong time, the kind where you think your heart may explode. I was so angry and hurt and wanted to DO something, but of course there's nothing anyone can legally do at this point. There is a fight ahead, but that's all I can say right now. I keep thinking back to our time at Christmas and the photos I took, and I wish I would have hugged them even more than I did.

I spent the evening at Donna's with Jim. The three of us had some drinks, some snacks, toasted the new year with champagne, and watched a movie. Very low-key and relaxing. When Jim and I left around 2:30 a.m. for the drive home in his car, it was snowing and had been for quite awhile. Everything was coated with that wonderful snow that sticks to tree branches and buildings. We felt like we were driving through another world.

I went out in my yard this morning and took some photos.





Today I'll focus on getting my head together, organizing things for work this week, and spending my last day of vacation reading and dozing on the couch. I wish I could say I was excited and hopeful about the new year, but at this point it feels like you drag crap from the old year into the new one and keep battling away. The year on the calendar changes, but you never really get a fresh start.

stand back and watch the giblets fly

Stonehenge, May 2002 (Wiltshire, England). Click for larger view.

I love this article:

Being the 'odd duck' at Thanksgiving

I can't identify with the first part, because I am close to my family and I do spend Thanksgiving with them. But the rest of it . . . too funny! Enjoy!

Have a great Thanksgiving, everyone. I'm off to eat mass quantities of salt, gravy, butter, gravy, sugar, gravy, potatoes . . . and did I mention gravy?

halloween reflections

An unsettling sculpture in a restaurant, oddly resembling Jim.

Overall, I had so much fun handing out candy last night. 99% of the kids and parents were happy, friendly, polite, and grateful. And I had close to 300 kids again. But then there are the few who, well, make a really good story.

I had SO MANY parents show up with bags and "kids in the car" stories this year. Is that the new trend?

My kid hurt his leg.
My kid is tired.
My kid is cold.
My kid is too shy.
My kid is is being punished.
My kid is an idiot.

The parents got just one piece of small candy. Next year I feel like putting up a big sign "MUST BE PRESENT TO RECEIVE CANDY." Or, I'll demand to be taken to the car, where I can give the candy to the injured / depressed / socially inept child myself.

Then I had a 15-ish year old girl who had a bag AND a backpack, AND was on her cell phone the whole time. When I didn't notice her open backpack, she turned around and pointed to it impatiently, still talking. If you're old enough to own a cell phone and call boys, you're too old to be begging for candy.

And BABIES with bags. One kid was maybe 6 months old and completely asleep, and the parents had a bag. You're telling me that this tiny toothless being is going to rip through licorice and Kit Kats when he wakes up? I think not.

Oh, and a few kids would reach in, take out the candy, examine it as if pondering whether to keep it, and then drop it back in. One kid asked for an exchange.

An exchange.

Like he's shopping at Target.

He's going to grow up to be someone's boss, I'm sure of it.

halloween traditions

Ready to carve the pumpkin:
Traditional pumpkin sniffing. This must be done immediately after you cut the top off the pumpkin. Stick your face into the hole and inhale the joyous pumpkin goodness:
Repeat.You can't tell from the photo, but this is a bushel of candy. Yes, I get that many trick or treaters! One year I got almost 300 kids.
The pumpkins are lit:
My house, ready for visitors:
Cerenna the duck, with Kristie:
Sophie the chicken, unhappy:
A child wearing a very convincing "Jim" costume, who ate a suspicious amount of Butterfingers and smoked a cigarette.
Pumpkin seeds, warm from the oven. Made with butter, garlic powder, Cajun seasoning, and salt.And there, you've just joined me on my Halloween evening. And now I'm off to watch The Nightmare Before Christmas. Because it's tradition.

self-portrait challenge: fire

Sparkly thoughts (click for full view).

O.K., here it is, my very first self portrait challenge. This month's theme is the elements - earth, air, fire and water, and how we relate to and identify with them. When I was lighting sparklers on July 4th this year, I started thinking about how fire and light is such a big part of holidays and seasons. Jack o' lantern candles, Christmas tree lights, campfires, fireworks, the changing hue of the sun and moon throughout the year.

July 4th always makes me nostalgic. It reminds me of picnics at my great-grandma's house, with tons of food, music, laughter, games, and sparklers to cap off the evening. Everyone was alive and all of us kids were so young. They're happy memories, but sad in the way that I miss the people who are no longer with us, or have fallen away after the huge traumatic event that shaped my family and changed us forever, too long of a story to go into here. So I think that's why I have such a wistful expression on my face - I'm thinking of all those sparklers lit on my great-grandma's hill, my cousins and brothers and me whirling them around in the dark and leaving swirling trails behind us.

summer solstice

My garden, late evening.

Enjoy the longest day of the year!